Nov 19 2008
In Heaven There Is No Beer…
I guess that’s what the song says. I don’t really care because I don’t drink beer. But, you know what? In my heaven there’s going to be chocolate mousse cake, Denali moosetracks ice cream, Jack’s chocolate chip cookies and big ass macaroni and cheese.
Who needs trumpets and music? Just as long as there’s no salad, Weight Watchers’ stuff or Glucerna.
I am so sick of watching calories, salt, sugar, glycemic index and fat content on everything I put in my mouth, heaven has to be way better than this.
After I’m dead, if someone happens to find that last piece of apple pie mysteriously missing–I ate it! Roving around in the dark, I’ll grab every bowl of chips and dip I can get my spooky hands on, then fall asleep in a heavenly rocking chair with a white robe draped over my gigantic belly.
I’ll make extra of everything just for you if you promise to come visit after you pass on. It reminds me of the empty chair we used to have at Bible study. It represented anyone who wanted to come, but for whatever reason couldn’t be there. Nice thought.
I, myself, am a chocoholic. Douse it in dark chocolate (especially Belgium type) and I’ll eat it. I draw the line at bugs, vermin, and veggies.
Get one of your grandkids to invent a delicious chocolate that ANYONE can devour on ANY basis and not get fat or ill.
Must run in the family - and can’t wait for heaven if it’s got the great food!! With a diet to keep the prothrombin time at a certain level, the cholesterol balanced, the triglycerides within normal range, and the blood sugar normal — not to mention all the supportive meds — give me heaven!!!